What is your grid?

My freshman year of college was intense. It was amazing and so hard at the same time. It was hard because it was a time my body was becoming much weaker, and amazing what God did to fill me with life. I decided to attend Concordia University, a small Lutheran school. I had lots of fun meeting new people, and enjoyed my speech class. But I found life in Young Life.

My senior year of high school I met a bunch of Young Life leaders who changed my life. Young Life is an organization of college age or older people that become leaders and share the love of Jesus with high school kids. Well immediately I knew I wanted to be a leader, so I started training my first semester of college. I met many life long friends. But aside from Young Life, me, a leader Mike Prentice, and two junior guys at Saline, Steve Nelson and James Strasburg met every Sunday night for man time. It was by far my favorite time of every week. It was a time of intentionally loving each other, sharing and fighting for our hearts, and there was an exchange of life. We pursued Jesus together. It ignited fire and passion in my heart. I learned so much that year.

One Sunday night we shared what we thought what our kingdoms or destiny would be. I shared I would get married, that me and my wife would have a family and be very happy. That was basically it. I figured that because of my situation our marriage would be so special and unique. I used to dream of having my wife take care of me and me fighting for her heart, and that everyday we would be thankful for everything. There was a time I was thankful for my disease, I was confused, it taught me to depend on God, to rest, to be patient and thankful. Well after I went Mike shared his, he also wanted to get married. But that morning a lady in his church told him he would do amazing things for God. Mike shared that with us and he knew that with his wife they would do miracles and crazy stuff. When he said this it felt liked the Holy Spirit grabbed me and never let go.

Over the next year living with Mike I realized that my dream was good but it was not big enough. I realized not to value my disease but to value me. This is is still happening because I have not known life without it. I learned God is so good that he uses all for His good. He is so good that despite my disease He gave me grace to learn the lifestyle of being thankful. That dream marriage and family is going to happen, it will be special and unique but not because of my disease, because its Jesus that makes it special and real. My grid was way off. I now dream of healing the sick and raising the dead, traveling all around the word. It is our responsibility to invade the impossible.

great brothers

Growing up in middle school and high school I hung out with my brother Michael a lot, he is only a year younger than I am. We shared the same group of friends for the most part. It was me, my bro, Jake, Kevin, Schmitty, Dan, and Jeff. They were all my best friends. They are my family for life. My house usually was the place we hung out, because it was most accessible to me. In the early years they spent the night at our house every Friday. It is some of the best memories I have. Going to get chinese food, staying up late talking, going on walks, and I could go on forever.

I now realize their friendships were vital to the man I am becoming, vital to the story God is telling through me. They loved me, they took care of me, they released life to me. As everyones friends teach us about life. Everyone is vital, they have a role to play, God has called ALL by name. God says to ALL you are mine! These are the ones He chose for me. I honor them, love them.

Jesus thank you!!!! Encounter them!!!! Let their identities and dreams be realized.

Intoxicated

I want to be intoxicated with the love of Jesus. He is the lover of my soul. I want to know who He is in me and I in Him. The more I experience Him the more I know I was born to be in an intimate friendship with Him. His very presence, His love is why I am alive. My identity as His Royal Priesthood is becoming more real to me.

Three years ago I was nineteen, I felt alone, scared, sad, and mad. I was just starting to find out who God was even though I was raised a Christian. Through real friends and books I learned that Jesus wants to pursue me, to have me live life to its fullest. But it brought no hope to the disease that plagued my body and soul. Spinal Muscular Atrophy was not new to me, I was born with it, I was supposed to die at eighteen months the doctors said. My parents are amazing. I was raised to have faith in God, to be positive and thankful, to not dream or live with the limits of my disease. They took huge risks, they didn't receive the news the doctors brought, I am forever in debt to them. They gave it all up for me. I was taught to be an over comer, and I felt like one. I had an amazing life, I never thought about why I was not walking or never felt sorry for myself. I owe that to my parents. I never second guessed myself, I believed I would get married and have a family. I believed everything happens for a reason, and that in Heaven I would walk.

My life dramatically changed at seventeen, one of my best friends also had SMA, and he died at sixteen. It crushed me. But I figured God must not be done with me. I made guy friends that wanted to pursue my heart, and not just play Nintendo. It brought me into deeper realms of God, it gave me passion to love and pray. At nineteen my body became much weaker in many ways. My disease became much bigger. Because of my friends, it made me question my disease, why did God give it to me, things I never thought about. I cried every night, asking God to keep me alive. I planned on moving out of my house to live with my best friend, to have some Independence. It was a desire of my heart, I thought God was doing me a favor before I died, I gave up the thought of being married. But two months before I moved out my new close friend/spiritual mom asked if I ever received prayer to walk, to be healed. My heart leaped for joy, but said no. She gave me a Bill Johnson cd, a pastor of Bethel Church in California. He talked of a good God in a good mood, a God that heals all disease, and not one that gives it. My soul loved every word, I couldn't get enough. He said everything I felt and knew about God, I just didn't see it. A month later my best friends anointed me in oil and laid hands on me, I felt the fire of God. It set me up on the adventure of my life. I saw my true destiny.

I'm twenty-two now, I'm still on that adventure. Thank you to Pastor Bill and pastor Kris for who you are. My fathers, my heroes. It is absolutely the will of God for me to be healed, for all to be healed. ON EARTH AS IN HEAVEN! HE WANTS TO HEAL NOW! Jesus intoxicate us with your love, drive out all disease! Good God!

good

God is so good to me.

It is almost summer. This weekend Chris Overstreet is coming to Michigan! Yes. I just talked to Sandi on the phone, she is from beenup2. She is so great. I'm supposed to write. I love Jesus. I'm getting stronger. I'm His.

Jesus all I want is you. God more!!